Happy weekend Beanies and keep Beaning On!
I am feeling like a second lead, just a smidge too late, that is.
I did extend my best wishes to you all ahead of the festivities, since internet was not an option while I met up with people during the Christmas and New Year celebrations. Still, a tiny part of me regrets not being online to celebrate with you all. My first OT of the new year used to be the list of new year resolutions, until covid affected everything. I have finally admitted to myself that I cannot keep those promises, so I will not be restarting that trend.
2022 overall was all right with ups and downs, but it was also a state of limbo. Since mid-2021 I have been on sick leave from work to search for the root of my mental problems and to improve myself with the aid of therapy. In order to battle the burn-out, depression and panic disorder, I was advised to go out and do things I like to do, but those same diagnoses often kept me from doing that. Sick leave itself is also under strict rules to avoid abuse, so it feels more like being in hiding instead of being entirely free.
2023 might be a better year for me. The root of my mental problems turned out to be autism spectrum disorder. This diagnosis offers a lot of understanding of my past, an explanation for the other 3 diagnoses among many other things, and an important piece of paper to turn things around at work and other places in the future.
I was in the middle of a one-year government job internship when I fell ill. On paper I am currently expected to finish this internship in accordance with the rules that applied when I started work late 2020. Once I finish the internship, I get officially appointed as a civil servant and then I will continue doing my job. There are many options out there, like temporary medical part time, job counselling, changing departments… but of course only for employees who have finished their internship and are appointed. Apparently, I am the first intern ever to need such options for medical reasons.
I foresee interesting discussions with about a dozen different departments to get things sorted, which may give me headaches at best and a lot more anxiety in the worst-case scenario.
Not to mention the dreadful fact that sooner or later I will have to face and inform my current team leader and coworkers that made me fall ill in the first place. On the other hand, behind all those hurdles lies job clarity in some still unknown form accompanied by freedom. That beats staying in limbo forever.
Open Thread #794
Source: Buzz Pinay Daily
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